“When
you find people who not only tolerate your quirks but celebrate them with glad
cries of, “Me too!” be sure to cherish them. Because those weirdos are your tribe.”
~~~
There is nothing more
important in life than your tribe. I learned this the hard way - the stubborn
way. I learned this by spending years proving to myself that I could travel and
live all over the world and survive on my own. Of course I could survive. But I
wasn’t thriving. Sure, I made lifelong connections and met the most incredible
people of all different countries and cultures and that is what I cherish most
about those experiences, but we as humans are meant to be a PART of something
constant. We’re meant to have a tribe - a community or group of people who keep
you grounded and support you and push you to exceed the physical and mental
limitations you have placed upon yourself. Personal success and accomplishments
in life mean nothing without a tribe to celebrate them with.
Through triathlon I
found my passion in life, but I also found my tribe. At first they were just
names of people I often heard my Dad speak about - just characters in someone
else’s story. When my parents were still in Australia, there was a time after I
had moved back to Texas that I was living in their house alone awaiting their
return. I was overcome with worry, fear, and anxiety. I still couldn’t leave
the couch, or eat, or sleep. People invited me out, but I couldn’t leave. I
felt paralyzed and just wanted to sit and wait for them to come through the
door, alive and healthy. That would be the first moment I could breathe and
know everything was going to be okay.
But it wasn’t long
before the doorbell started ringing unexpectedly. These strangers whose names I
had heard dozens of times were now standing at the front door with food and
gifts. My inbox flooded with messages from people I had only heard stories
about. It was just me, alone in my parents house, with enough food to feed
myself - and a high school football team - for weeks. I’d never experienced this
kind of love and compassion from strangers before. But they cared about my family,
and so they cared about me. I know they were just trying to support my parents,
but I don’t think they – or even myself - realized how much their gestures
would change the way I prioritized my life.
My desire to be a
part of this tribe wasn’t immediate. Falling in love with Triathlon is
something that derives from a deep desire within yourself to be better, to do
better, with an ever-developing desire and self determination to want to demolish and
destroy all previous boundaries within your life. The tribe and community comes
with that, and evolves over time. There is no better way to get close to people
than battling out grueling winds on a bike, fighting unforgiving waves in a
lake or ocean, and climbing muscle-blasting hills on a run side by side. You are on
the battlefield together - in the trenches - with war stories only you and the
members of your tribe can comprehend. The kind you don’t even have to talk
about, you just look at them and see and feel the expressions they're wearing - whether it be
anticipation, determination, pain, relief, frustration, or pure joy – and your
simple reaction is, “I know the feeling – I get you.”
There is no greater
feeling in the world than that of being understood. The single most important
thing the members of my team and I all have in common is we all made it to the
starting line. We don’t always know what got each other there, but what we do
know is that to be on that starting line means they’ve already been through
some tough sh** in life and survived. And now they mean business. Some of us
have struggled with a physical illness, others have struggled with mental illness.
Some of us fight the battle for loved ones we’ve lost, or for the ones who can
no longer fight for themselves. Some of us take on the challenge for longevity,
so they can play with their grandchildren. For some its for our youth, because we’ve
learned that staying up all night and drinking ourselves into a full day of mind
fog and laziness the next day is not as meaningful and fulfilling as it once
seemed. My tribe is full of badass men and women, and because I surround myself
with them, I am one of them.
My tribe is my
family. They have seen me at my highest of highs and lowest of lows, and they have
supported me during both. There is something about having an entire community
of people who believe in you, who are cheering for you to succeed, that makes
you feel invincible. One high five, one person yelling your name, one smile or simple
“you’ve got this” nod from a teammate can dissolve all uncertainty and self-doubt.
Ironman is and always will be a personal accomplishment – the result of hours
of physical and mental training – but the victory of crossing a finish line is
so much sweeter when you can share that feeling of pure euphoria and bliss with
others.
To live well is to
live in community. To be successful is to help others succeed. To be fulfilled
is to be filled to the brim with love and compassion. Your tribe is your foundation
- the substance of your life. They are what remains constant in an everchanging
world of uncertainty. They are what remains when everything else is stripped
away. Your tribe is your peace in the chaos and your refuge through life’s storms.
Once you have experienced and expressed complete gratitude for this incredible
blessing of human connection, you will truly know what it means and how it
feels to be happy. Love your tribe, love your people, and thrive together.
“Here’s
to the crazy ones. The misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers. The ones who see
things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the
status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, disbelieve them, glorify or
vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do, is ignore them because they
change things. They invent. They imagine. They heal. They explore. They create.
They inspire. They push the human race forward. Maybe they have to be crazy.
Because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world,
are the ones who do.”- Jack Kerouac
